This week has been a tough one. My sweet Grandmother, who had a big part in raising me, had a stroke last Tuesday, on Reagan's birthday. She is 90 years old. On Thursday evening, they made the decision to cease all treatment and move her to hospice. It was most definitely the best decision for her, and she has been peaceful and resting ever since. However, for her family, it is a terrible waiting game. The uncertainty of the inevitable is hard to take. And, at times like this it is very hard to be so far away.
I struggled throughout the week, wondering if I should go. I knew if I bought the $820 round-trip ticket for this weekend, I might not make it in time. I also know that I will need/want to be there for her funeral, so if I went now I would be looking at 2 back to back trips. While I desire to say good-bye to her, I also know that it is easier for me not to see her the way she is right now. I had a great visit with her in November and am thankful to have that as what will probably be my last memory of her. My thoughts and prayers have constantly been with my grandmother and the family that is struggling through this by her side. We are all emotionally exhausted. We are ready for her to be in heaven with my Papa, but that doesn't make saying good-bye any easier.
My girls have been great therapy. It is amazing to talk with them about it. Everything is so simple for them.....she will just be in heaven and that is good! They have prayed with me for her and we mailed her special pictures they made (praying they make it in time). I have been singing "Amazing Grace" , Granny's favorite song, to Gracyn while I rock her to sleep. Now, she asks me to sing, "Granny's song". I am thankful my girls got to know their Great-Grandma.
I am so thankful for the blessing my sweet grandmother has been in my life. She is one special person. She often comes to mind on a daily basis, when my children have a million requests for me. During the times I get impatient with serving them, I remember her. I think of all she did for me.....any breakfast my heart desired, homemade french-fries for an afternoon snack, hundreds of clothes shopping trips, getting up before me to turn the heat up and warm the house, and much more. She did anything I ever wanted, with love and a smile. I love her dearly! Praying that she will sleep peacefully until she is wrapped in the arms of our Lord. Wish I was there to tell her I love her and hold her sweet hand one last time.
4 comments:
Oh Kim, I'm sorry. I went through a similar situation with my grandpa as he battled dimensia. He was key to raising me as well. Praying for your Grandma, you and your family.
Kim, So sorry to hear your about your grandmother. I know it must be very hard. When I lost my grandfathers a few years ago, I was reminded by how lucky I was to have been able to spend so many years growing up close to them, and then getting to know them once I was an adult. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Sweet Girl, I will pray. I'm so sorry to know she's slipping away from this earth.
Kim, call her. Hearing is so often still intact for people in hospice care (my mother was a hospice volunteer for several years). Call and ask someone to hold the phone up to her ear and tell her you love her. She already knows, oh how she knows, but tell her one more time FOR YOU.
May you know His perfect peace during these days and always.
We love you.
Praying for your family Kim!
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